Month 1 Intro: Spending

This month is all about the benjamin's.

...or lack thereof.

I shudder to think of all the money we've wasted over the years, truly. I can't even fathom it.

We go out to eat more than I care to put in writing, we spend money carelessly on things we really didn't even need in the first place, and we waste/break/misplace so much food/toys/belongings that I can't imagine how much we spend replacing it all. And then we have the nerve to cry the blues at the end of every month when we have to scrimp and save to pay our bills. Woe is us.

And before I go on, I know that we are pretty tame compared to most people in the US. I read somewhere that the average American household of 2.5 individuals (how can you have .5 of an individual anyway?) spends about 4K a month on expenses. We spend about 3K give or take. We don't always follow a strict budget, but we DO think about bills before anything else, it's just that we give the bills our last penny instead of giving them our first. Our consumerism takes ahold of us and it shows in our bank accounts, which could definitely be a lot larger than they are now. We have the means, but lack a lot of the know-how and motivation to get everything where it needs to be.

Richie and I often talk about how tired we are of worrying about how we're going to pay for XYZ and how depressing it is to take any extra income we receive and put it towards overdue bills. Just once, I would like to walk into a store and walk out with a few things we don't need and NOT feel guilty about it. I would like to take that random, unplanned day trip with the kids. Heck, I would even settle for a planned day trip at this point, but even that seems out of the question.

And you know what the most frustrating part about all this is? We are not poor. At all really. We are extremely blessed even. Richie has a great job that pays him well and has allowed us to buy a home, raise three kids, and have me home everyday to take care of it all. That's practically unheard of in a world where both parents HAVE to work in order to make ends meet. I know so many moms would do anything for the opportunities I have, and I am truly grateful. That's why it's so frustrating to struggle when I KNOW God gave me every means to keep my household running smoothly. At the end of every month, when we look at our pitiful savings, it almost seems like a spit in God's face. Like "Hey God, thanks for keeping our car running another month. You know as well as I do that we couldn't afford to fix it if it broke down on us right? How 'bout, instead of us setting up an emergency savings fund, you just promise us you'll keep the car running for a little while yet while we celebrate over here at Red Lobster and the mall. Sound alright with you?"

Obviously that isn't our true mindset, but it might as well be. As a Christian, I know my family is supposed to set an example. If we are struggling in an area that we have every opportunity to excel at, than that is a reflection of our Christianity, pure and simple. We'll never have it all together, but we can surely be doing better than we are now. This first month, spending, will hopefully help us cut back in areas that we tend to waste money on. We chose spending to be out first month because we know how important it is that we set up a REAL budget. A budget that only allows for spending on the important things first and foremost, and THEN if we have a little extra, it is ours to do with as we see fit.

But what exactly WILL we see fit? I hope to elaborate on that later in the month...

Anyway, we aren't going to follow Jen Hatmaker's rules in 7 to a T. For example, she listed gas as one of her seven choices for the month and restricted her spending to one specific gas station. That's really not possible for us since Richie works so far from home, and to rely on one gas station as the only source of fuel is kind of reckless. Especially since towing expenses won't be one of our seven choices for the month and that's bound to come up if we adhere to that rule. So here is our list of seven "vendors" for the month.

Shop Rite
Gas
Bills
Church
Target
Emergency fund
1 Family activity

Now I realize some of those are broad, like you can buy any and everything in Target so really, what are you giving up? And family activity, isn't the whole point to save this month and not go out? Well, yes and no.

When Jen Hatmaker wrote her chapter on spending, she realized that her family averaged about 66 vendors a month. That's a lot. A whole lot more than us, and I still think we spend a lot in many places we don't need to. So while the purpose of her month was to cut back  on their consumerism in a huge way, I want our focus to be on creating more of a family budget we can stick to. I still think we can cut back in a lot of places, like fast food, and we will. But I don't want to cut back on absolutely EVERYTHING, because well, we have three kids...one of which has a birthday this month. And if we want to take them somewhere special and spend a SMALL amount of money spoiling them for a little, then I think that's OK.

Jen Hatmaker cheated a lot in the book too! So there!

As far as Target goes, again, we will be setting some ground rules. We can only go there after we have exhausted every other means of purchasing "whatever it is" and we can only get that particular item(s) that we need and nothing else. Which is super hard because, as you know, Target has a little bit of everything. I don't think I've ever gone in there and came out with less than 15 things. Do they even have a speedy checkout line for ten items or less? If they do I've never seen it, let alone needed to use it.

There's a lot more I'd like to expand on and explore throughout this month, so stick with me. I know this won't be the hardest month we will go though, but it is still going to be pretty tough. I will miss you take out food, I will miss you random trips to CVS to get another tube of lipstick that I don't need, I will miss you mall, I will miss you children's clothing stores, and I will REALLY miss you Barnes and Noble. I will see you in 31 days. Hopefully then we can foster a better relationship between us, one in which I need you less and you miss me more.

Here's to month one!